Tuesday, 23 November 2010

It seems like the dark days are over. Now I dont want to come over a little emo on you but I think after what was possibly the hardest year of my life I've finally come through. I feel good. In fact I feel more than good, I feel bloody brilliant.
I'm going to start reading again and writing again (this included) I feel like I've got my passion for life back. Hell, I've even got a job. I didnt think I'd be up to working again after I stormed out of my last one because the stuff with my dad made me burst into tears evey 5 minutes. Now I'm no expert but I dont think employers like that!
I've been thinking a lot about things, and have realised a few bits about myself. I wish I could apologise to so many people for acting like a total dick(even as far back as school), and what probably came across as very irrational. Now my dad is out of my life at the moment things have become clearer and I realise that he put a few things in my head which I'm trying to clear out now. I think the best decision I made was to move to Birmingham for university. But even then he had a hold on me. And the rest of my family. Only when he gets the help he needs for his head will I ever consider seeing him again. It's sad and I'm aware all of this probably doesnt make sense but I got the urge to write and that is what this blog is for.
So for now, I just needed to confirm to myself that I am truely happy. My mother is the most amazing, strong person, and me an my wee sis are closer than we've ever been.
I've met some great people up here, hopefully friends I will have for a long time, and one amazing boyfriend who for the two years we have been together has brought me out of my shell, opened my eyes and made me feel alive. So I will be forever grateful to him, and his patience with me! I know we're going to have an amazing future.

Now thats all out I will continue soon with updates, fiction and general daily observations!
Lots of happy vibes xxx